I felt bad I did not
move in to hug you but instead provided you with a stiff firm hand shake-
[i would have liked nothing more to hold a friend close for a second-]
its just you uttered some nonsense about acting normal once-
there is no such thing as normal.
i spent most of life trying that word on like an ill fitting suit
like a tie whose noose was too tight around my neck-
[pretending to be professional-
professionals in firms don't hug. ]
you never realized that
you always had my respect-
now it's all you have.