Saturday, October 06, 2018

ibelieveher

No.

Not say.

Do.

Hold you.
Hold me.

Mourn.
Weep.
Sleep.

Tomorrow,
we prepare for the fight
of our lives.

No.

Not say.

Fight.

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

impossible to ignore

(B- Side)


Dolores wears a wedding dress of see through ivory lace and chiffon,
tall white laced boots, as her groom arrives by horse.

Aileen buys a Cranberries cd at the Northridge Mall, while on our
class field trip. She unwraps it on the bus. I am in love with her friend.

Boy George ruins Linger for me
with a juvenile remark in a magazine.
Fuck him.

Rogin blast enemies on the arcade screen, singing "and your
tanks and bombs and your guns" in the doughnut shop.

And eternally, Elton will be unable to find his CD, raises his hand and
asks to go to the quad before somebody snags it.
As if.

Saturday, May 21, 2016

There are

(Short Poem Series)


There are really only three
things a true writer needs-

1) a pen
(preferably, a good one)

2) paper
(so you don't forget what you wanted to say)

3) something to write about-
(?)

Two out of three ain't bad


In the dark

(Short poem series)

In the dark,
she shed some clothes-

And with 
it 
sheds light 
on the
last mystery.

Saturday, February 06, 2016

Mr. KnowItAll

I've made it my business,
to know.

To know architecture,
books, movies and music.

To know art,
politics, technology and history

To know how to speak to the
 intellectual and the vapid.

I've made it my business to be
a real know it all.

So, when anyone asks,
"Why do you know so much?"

I tell 'em simply.

"When you're beautiful and rich,
you don't need to know anything."

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

This Also And

This,
Also,
And-

All absorb
Time.

Give Nothing.

Attach

This Nothing
Also Nothing
And Nothing.

Sunday, July 26, 2015

Poem Scraps

I.
While writing other things:
 
De Incendiis Corporis Humani Spontaneis
Human Combustion

I hate the both of you,
one times 2,
one times 3.

She is ugly in a beautiful kind of way
She is beautiful in ugly kind of way

In the morning she will have a story
to tell of how she narrowly avoided getting wet.

II.
I have felt your
hands slipping before-

maybe I've no right
to try  to hold
your hand tighter.

From the moment you came into my life,
I've tried to prepare for you leaving.

I learned we are the same with
goodbyes.

Sneaking out,
in silence.

(We have that in common)

But if you don't hear from me again,
its because i've run out of ways to
say I'm sorry.

III.
Letting  you in,
has been a most dangerous thing.

I've know
Carelessness
Indifference
Rejection
before.

but compared
to the damage I do to myself
you and all the rest,
have been amateurs.

Fucking amateurs.

"If you want something done right,
you gotta do it your self."

IV.
I was told-
that my soul
was under the impression,
that suffering was the surest way to you.

There are times
I question everything you do.

Including your very existence.

In matters of my heart,
I thought you most cruel.

Waiting to the last possible moment to answer.

I don't want to suffer anymore.

So you've granted me
Mercy-

You let me see you in eyes of woman.
You let me feel you in her heart.
You let me feel you in my own heart.

Then you took it away.

Mercy-

V.
So hands join together not hold, but to clap
So she says "its time to go, I drawn you a map.
So the spring that released set in motion a trap
So empty the box, left behind like the gift to unwrap

VI.
 as if
We will never die,

though the flame will
weaken into embers.

What was once a raging fire-
(consuming all in its path)
must become ashes.

There is a cycle of destruction  and birth.

what came before
what comes after,
what was destroyed this cycle
gave birth.

It gives birth to us.

VII.
For the moment, I feel they have lifted the curse,
the one given to me at birth, to carry by hearse, on my way back to the earth.



12/13- 7/15

Friday, June 19, 2015

I Forgot All About That

I remember
you invited me to your roommates baby shower,
and I never made it because I spent the whole day making spaghetti for the potluck.
You got mad, because I called late at night to ask if I should still bring my dish.
You also invited me to Lou's party, but never gave me the address.

I remember
you dancing to Outkast with your roommate and me in your living room, and it was the kind of moment that brings a small light in remembering it. You also tried to teach me the Beyonce moves from Crazy in Love, but I never had much coordination.

I remember
the Polaroid pictures of you on the potty, taken by your then live in boyfriend, hanging on the wall, before we were even introduced. Even before meeting, I knew the person in those pictures might understand the Zen of it all. You also asked your then boyfriend to do me that one favor, that one time.

I forgot that
we were going to be roommates but I still hadn't gotten my act together then.
we were going to be writing partners and make a children's book like the Hubley's did "The Hat"
but we never got around to it. we saw my ex girlfriend at the Pixies concert and you gave her a dirty look for me.

I forgot that
we were going to be pen pals, but I never sent out the first letter, even though I sat down and finished it. we were going to watch the movie "Manhattan" in a cemetery, but can't remember why we didn't go. we went to that Japanese restaurant where the owner gives you free desert if she likes you, and she did.

I forgot that
we were close at one time. we were part of each others lives, until I told you that I saw my spiritual reflection in you, and you turned on me. You got mad that I would impose that feeling on you, that I would violate some boundary. I didn't say I loved you, but what I said was just as bad.
(To you, maybe worse.)

I had never told anyone I saw my reflection in them before, I doubt ever will again.
Either way you didn't want anything to do with spiritual reflections or me, ever again.

It hurt to lose you so completely.
We were friends, then nothing.

I wish I could forget how it ended.
I wish I could forget the details.
I wish I could forget we were close at one time.

I but I have to remember, so that at least one of us does.


Subscribe to Los Brainacs via Email